Torn Between Two Loves (7-Nov-2011)

09 Aug


..That is between my love for numbers and my love for the arts. I wrote this in my journal two months ago and I think now is the right time to share it.

Here is the deal: Would you choose something so familiar over something that is completely unknown to you? Flashback in middle school when they conducted career development workshops and passed around modules on the different courses you could take in college. Would you believe I included Computer Engineering and Political Science in my list? I ended up taking Business instead ’cause I thought it was the surest and safest way to go.

Business entails a lot of Math. And yes, I like the subject very much. No pun intended. Let us not complicate things here though. If I ask myself “1 + 1” or if I ask you or a stranger the same question, we end up with the same answer. Easy, isn’t it? We only need to follow the formula. There is a clear-cut guideline on what we have to do like categorizing assets from liabilities, revenue from expense. There is a way to know whether we’re doing it right or not and our performance is measured whether we adhere to the principles.

However, being an artist (whatever your medium is – music, film, photography, fashion, architecture, etc…), takes depth and creativity. One is not bound by anything. No rules. No restrictions. But my apologies when the coward in me takes over. It’s the fear of acceptance. It’s that part of myself that seeks approval..and..validation. How many times did I let the voice say it’s going to be irrelevant and meaningless?  How many times did I let people trample on my feelings by saying that I couldn’t. I guess, I just affirmed their remarks and made them victorious had I not tried.

Now the question, am I ready to take the big leap? Well, all I know is that I’m taking steps to pave way to the path where I should be.



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Posted by on August 9, 2012 in Uncategorized


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